Boundaries has become a buzzword. It used to be that boundaries were entirely physical, but the notion has made a grand entrance into the emotional. Most often, I hear people talk about boundaries with family and friends. If my friend makes fun of me, I will leave the room. If my parents bring up my finances, I will ask them to change the subject. If my children do not put away their clean clothes, I will not do their laundry. Yet, boundaries are also necessary in professional situations.
At various times in my 23-year teaching career, I’ve spotted burnout just around the corner. I’ve addressed it through finding a mentor, going to therapy, and changing how I teach. Many strategies exist, but my greatest strategy, which I only found in the past couple of years, is to establish boundaries.
In the bestselling book Boundaries by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend and in psychotherapist Terri Cole’s podcast focused on boundaries, key ideas that define boundaries appear repeatedly.
- Boundaries require clear, specific communication that often follows an if you…I will format. For example, if you do not turn an assignment in on time, I will not assess it until we have had a written or verbal conversation about why it was late.
- Boundaries are about you and your responses to others. What are you willing to do? What are you unwilling to do? They are more about changing you than about changing others. For example, I am willing to help you before or after school, but I cannot help you during my lunch break.
- Boundaries are necessary because they prevent the growth of resentment, anger, and bitterness. Boundaries can be uncomfortable to communicate, but they ultimately preserve relationships.
For me, certain boundaries have helped me love my work as a teacher and prevented the resentment, anger, and bitterness that contribute to burnout.
- If an administrator or colleague asks me to help with an event or join a committee, I only say yes when it makes me feel excited and aligns with my top two or three professional passions. (For me, those are grading practices and teacher recruitment and retention.) When I have spread myself thin in the past, I was unable to give my best to each endeavor and found bitterness growing as well.
- I love creating lessons, but I hate assessing student work. That’s just my natural bent. I have colleagues who love and hate entirely different aspects of our profession. For me to love my work, I had to research the very thing that attacked my joy and figure out what was best for students and for me. When I set boundaries about what I would and would not grade, both my students and I found more joy in the classroom. (See Going Gradeless: A Liberation from Anxiety.)
- I used to keep a stash of granola bars in my cupboard for students to grab if they were hungry. That first year, I was constantly running out because students would take several at a time and bring their friends into my room to take some as well. The next year, I kept the granola bars in my desk, students asked if they could have one, and I gave only one. These boundaries allowed me to still help my students without feeling like they were taking advantage of my kindness. In addition, my connection with the students who were hungry increased because of our increased interaction.
As educators we must take steps to avoid burnout. Our schools need us now more than ever. At the end of June 2023, South Dakota had 410 open teaching positions (link). According to the South Dakota Department of Education, “During the 2022-23 school year, about 175 vacancies went unfilled” (link). For me, boundaries have been the best strategy for keeping burnout at bay and making my classroom one of my favorite places to be.
